You would almost think that I came up with the old motto “Why do today what you can put off until tomorrow?” Yes, I’m that bad. If it’s a project I have no interest in, or it’s cleaning…I put it off until I’m going completely nuts living in or around it.
I grew up in a very small town in Alaska called Homer. Homer is on Kachemak Bay and was a central hub for A LOT of the fish processing (salmon, king crab, shrimp, etc) that took place in the state. Every summer, the locals would be bombarded by kids from the lower 48 (our town’s population would swell from 5,000 in the winter to over 10,000 in the summer) and tourists from all over the world. Imagine a 5 mile long peninsula trying to hold almost half of those folks! It was called “tent city” in those days. Here’s the Homer Spit. Here’s where I went to High School (it has nothing to do with my story…it’s just cool).
Now repeat saying the number 6 to yourself as fast as you can for 15 seconds. Then scroll down
QUICK!! THINK OF A VEGETABLE! then arrow down.
1. My mother taught me to APPRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE.
“If you’re going to kill each other, do it outside. I just finished cleaning.”
2. My mother taught me RELIGION.
“You better pray that will come out of the carpet.”
3. My mother taught me about TIME TRAVEL.
“If your don’t straighten up, I’m going to knock you into the middle of next week!”
4. My mother taught me LOGIC.
“Because I said so that’s why.”
5. My mother taught me MORE LOGIC.
“If you fall out of that swing and break your neck, you’re not going to the store with me.”
6. My mother taught me FORESIGHT.
“Make sure you wear clean underwear, in case you’re in an accident.”
7. My mother taught me IRONY.
“Keep crying and I’ll give you something to cry about.”
8. My mother taught me about the science of OSMOSIS.
“Shut your mouth and eat your supper.”
9. My mother taught me about CONTORTIONISM.
“Will you look at that dirt on the back of your neck!”
10. My mother taught me about STAMINA.
“You’ll sit there until all that spinach is gone.”
11. My mother taught me about WEATHER.
“This room of yours looks like a tornado went through it.”
12. My mother taught me about HYPOCRISY.
“If I’ve told you once, I’ve told you a million times. Don’t exaggerate.”
13. My mother taught me the CIRCLE OF LIFE.
“I brough you into this world, I can take you out.”
14. My mother taught me about BEHAVIOR MODIFICATION.
“Stop acting like your father!”
15. My mother taught me about ENVY.
“There are millions of less fortunate children in the world who don’t have wonderful parents like you.”
16. My mother taught me about ANTICIPATION.
“Just you wait until we get home!”
17. My mother me taught about RECIEVING.
“You are going to get it when you get home!”
18. My mother taught me MEDICAL SCIENCE.
“If you don’t stop crossing your eyes, they are going to freeze that way.”
19. My mother taught me ESP.
“Put your sweater on; don’t you thinkI know when you’re cold?”
20. My mother taught me HUMOR.
“When that lawn mower cuts off your toes, don’t come running to me.”
21. My mother taught me HOW TO BECOME AN ADULT.
“If you don’t eat your vegetable, you’ll never grow up.”
22. My mother taught me GENETICS.
“You’re just like your father.”
23. My mother taught me about my ROOTS.
“Shut that door behind you. Do you think you were born in a barn?”
24. My mother taught me WISDOM.
“When you get ot be my age, you’ll understand.”
25. My mother taught me JUSTICE.
“One day you’ll have kids, and I hope they turn out just like you!”
Okay. So I know I’m supposed to be cleaning my house right now.
Sunday’s a comin. And I haven’t folded the laundry, washed the dishes or done diddly-squat.
Did the fly-lady super fling boogie and all I have left to show for it is a messy house.
Did I mention there are purple grape jelly stains on my carpet?
Oh…and when I moved the couches to look under them for toys…you don’t EVEN want to know what else I found.
I really need to clean. The compulsion to do it is there…it’s just not as strong as my overwhelming compulsion to read other people’s blogs today. After all, what better to do on a rainy, gray day than to sit in front of the pc and surf blogs?
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